Thursday, August 29, 2013

Cabal Hijack! Meet Destiny

*Honey Hickhouse plops down in the seat across from Destiny, pigtails bouncing and eyes wide.*

Honey:  “Howdy do! I’m supposed to do an interview with a lady who has sex with a wolfman! Can you believe that?” *Honey cranes her neck, looking around the studio.* “I wonder what she looks like?”

Destiny: *clears her throat and raises her eyebrows*

Honey: “Oh shoot! You’re the wolfman-doin’ lady I’m supposed to talk to, ain’t ye? You’ll hafta excuse me. I don’t get off the farm much, or outta Longfeller’s bed. Know what I mean?”

Destiny: “I’m just going to go ahead and…” *Takes the microphone from Honey, who’s blowing into it and licking it just a little.* “My name is Destiny – well I should say my new name is Destiny. Basically, ever since I read a story about shifters that live in New Orleans I knew that was the life for me. I packed up and headed to New Orleans in search of the shifter clan. Even though the book said the shifters were just fictional characters, I knew differently—and I was right.”

Honey: “Let me get this straight. You went in search of a werewolf on purpose? I hope you brought yourself a shot-gun! You must be quite the hunter.”

Destiny: “I would say that I am totally awesome and super dedicated. I mean, who else would give up their life-family-work to hunt down a shifter pack?

Honey: *eyes narrowed and head cocked* “No one I know.”

Destiny: “But, you have to understand, Zane Leporidae is a total hunk. He’s the pack leader and total package. He owns The Shrine, the shifter bar in The Warehouse district in New Orleans. He’s got white blond hair and a killer body—a body that I love touching and stroking often. *giggles*

Honey: *eyes lighting up with recognition* “Oh, he’s hot! Now I’m starting ta git it. He sounds hotter than a tin roof in August! Soooo, what’s the sex like?”

Destiny: *fans self* “Hot. He leaves me breathless in the bed. We’ve had sex on just about every sturdy surface in his room. Now that I’m a member of the pack, I have started bartending at The Shrine. I’m hoping for an afterhours bar hump pretty soon. Everyone says that we fuck like bunnies.” *snicker*

Honey: “Hmmm, so if you could change one thing, what would it be?”

Destiny: “Although I’m happy with Zane, I think I would have tried to find the Bear Shifter bar. I’ve always had a thing for bears.”

Honey: *eyes wide, Honey reaches out to shake her hand* “You are one crazy lady.” *Honey’s boob pops out of her shirt* “Damn these titties! Who’s got tape?” *Honey wanders off*

Destiny is the girl who has her own life-size teddy in A.M. Griffin’s story in the anthology Fondled and Gobbled: Back for More. Honey Hickhouse is the congenial hick from Piper Trace’s story in the Fondled and Gobbled: Messier than Ever

You can find out about A.M. Griffin from her website:
Twitter @amgriffinbooks

And you can find out all about Piper from her website:
Twitter @PiperTrace

Fondled and Gobbled: Back for More

A bakery owner gets much more than she expected from her discount android’s determination to serve her. A lovelorn stalker does whatever it takes to have the muscle man of her dreams.

Two alien warriors experience the inconveniences and pleasures of being forced into human bodies. A woman has always known she was destined to join the paranormal world of shifters, and tonight all of her dreams—or nightmares—come true.

If you’re looking for the perfect romance with the perfect hero and heroine, this isn’t it! This is a series of spoofs, parodies, just-for-fun lighthearted take-offs. It’s for all us longtime, hard-core romance readers who can laugh at the clichés, purple prose and “suspend your disbelief” plot devices that haunt our beloved favorite genre.

An Exotika® erotica anthology from Ellora’s Cave.


Danica Avet said...

*sigh* I'm wiping away tears. Honey and Destiny just about killed me reading their stories.

Thanks for letting the Cabal have at your blog!

Desiree Holt said...

I have to get this book. The interview had me laughing so hard I snorted my tea. Good work, y'all.

Piper Trace said...

Thanks Dalton for having us on your blog! I want to apologize for Honey. She means well, but...well, bless her heart. ;-)

<3 Piper

Naima Simone said...

Yaay! So glad to have Cabal back at Naughty Author Chicks!! I about cried reading the interview! LOL! Awesome! And it made my day!

Piper Trace said...

I'm glad you folks liked the interview! These books were so much fun to write! I hope you enjoy them. :)

Ashlyn Chase said...

My favorite line: "Honey’s boob pops out of her shirt* “Damn these titties! Who’s got tape?” LOL!

You're nuttier than I am...and that's saying a lot! Love it!

Piper Trace said...


Hi Ashlyn! I'm glad you enjoyed the interview. Just wait until Honey's interview! She has a hard time keeping track of her...jugs (both her catfish jugs and her boobs). Her spoof story takes place while catfish jugging. It's the most fun anyone's ever had while catfish jugging with a vampire!

<3 Piper

Dalton Diaz said...

Oh man, I was laughing so hard reading these. Just wait. Every one of them will have you ROFL!