Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Flowers, Candles and Red Box

Friday I celebrated my eleventh year wedding anniversary. Eleven years with my wonderful, supportive, sexy husband. Oh how I love thee! One of the reasons I love and appreciate him so much is he had to put up with me for over a decade...and he stuck around when any sane man would have run screaming for the Downy-scented-laundry-folded-hot-meals-on-the-table hills. Maybe I made him crazy enough to stay.

One of the odd things about our pairing is he's such a romantic and, well, I'm not. I know, I know. How can a romance writer not be romantic? Believe me. It's possible. My pastor asked me the same question when he found out what I wrote--which was right after he received a letter from an anonymous member who wanted me put out of the church because of my evil, depraved ways...Apparently me and Jezebel are kin! Hee-hee! Seriously, I think he was more shocked that the woman from the annual couple retreats who follows up the word "sex" with "I don't need all that. Let's just get to it" is the same one who pens hot and detailed love scenes. It's true though. I don't need all the bells and whistles. Flowers and candles. Ropes and feathers. The first time my husband sent flowers to my job for a birthday I later told him, it was sweet 'n all, but don't bother. Black stuff grows on the vase, the flowers die and I feel like I'm watching thirty bucks die on the vine. That's depressing! Give me a pair of shoes or a gift card to Barnes 'n Nobles and let's call it a day. He might have been a little perturbed then but with distance, I really think he appreciated my honesty.

In my humble opinion--and since this is my blog I can give it--romance is subjective. One person's candlelit dinner is another's Red Box movie and take-out. That would be me, by the way. My idea of a great time is a whole day together doing nothing but lying in bed and watching t.v. or movies. Add some take-out from our favorite Italian restaurant and I'm in Utopia. His idea, on the other hand, is a linen-covered table, candles, wine, flowers, great food and Kenny G--or R. Kelly--playing softly in the background. Sometimes I feel like pulling the Julia Roberts card in Pretty Woman and say, Hey, I'm kind of a sure thing. But I know sex isn't the reason--well, not the main reason--he loves doing these things for me. It's his way of expressing his affection and appreciation. So, as bad as it sounds, I let him. And he lets me.

Although, this weekend he did surprise me with a gaw-geous hotel room complete with flower petals from the door to the bed, votive candles, a fountain and Cherry Coke chilling in the ice bucket. *sigh* I have to admit, it was romantic. Especially that Symphony chocolate bar sitting in front of the ice bucket. But, a secret? The best gift by far was the single cup coffee maker with the huge water reservoir. Now that made me want to jump his bones!! And I did! *snicker*

Now you know my Al Bundy-esque idea of romance. What's yours?


Wynter Daniels said...

Awwwwww. I totally get what you're saying because I have a guy just like that, a diehard romantic and I am not always particularly romantic. They say people hire their weaknesses - maybe we write ours;-)

Michelle Polaris said...

You have a keeper, Naima. I'm not the most romantic myself, and am very content with low-key celebrations. But it's extra sweet to know you have someone who loves you so much he'll put in all that effort. Happy Anniversary. You two look beautiful together and very happy in the picture. Thanks for sharing.

Jina Bacarr said...

What a lovely tribute to your hubby, Naima. You're a beautiful soul with a good heart. Keep on writing--and loving your man!

Callie Croix said...

Aw, Naima, you've got a keeper! I'm so glad that you appreciate him the same way he obviously appreciates you.

My 11 year anniversary is this Friday, and I have no idea what to get my man. He's not big on romance, but sometimes he surprises the heck out of me. Like last year, for our 10th anniversary, he surprised me with a trip to New Orleans, then secretly arranged for my critique partner to show up in the middle of Jackson Square. I got to spend three days with her, which is still by far one of the best memories of my life.

I can't buy him flowers or anything, so I'm at a loss as to what to get him. I'll think of something!

Casey Crow said...

Happy Anniversary, Naima. Y'all look so happy! Here's to many, many more years!

Naima Simone said...

Wynter and Michelle, I'm sooo glad I'm not the only un-romantic one around here! LOL! But thank goodness the awesome hubbies pick up our slack!!

Naima Simone said...

Hi, Jina!
Thank you so much! I'm going to keep on doing both--writing and lovin' him!!

Naima Simone said...

Hi, Callie!
Congratulations and Happy--early--anniversay!! I see your problem though. How DO you top that gift he gave you last year?? That is so thoughtful, loving and awesome! What a great guy! Keep me posted on what you end up getting him. I'm dying to know!

Naima Simone said...

Hey, Casey!
Thank you, thank you!! That man ain't going' nowhere! LOL! I told him we have 111 more years to go!