Friday, December 31, 2010

Happy New Years Eve!

Happy New Years Eve, everyone! As I write this I'm not entirely sure what my plans are for tonight. I do know that tonight will be different than my last, ahem, 10 or so New Years Eve nights. Why? Because I can't drink! Oh, the horror, lol. Since I can't partake in certain festivities I don't feel like hanging out downtown or with a bunch of rowdy friends who don't have a mute button. We do have an invite to a bonfire so if it's not too cold, I think that's what we'll be doing. And we don't have to worry about a designated driver b/c that will be me!


It's still hard to believe 2011 is almost here. This past year has flown by so fast and so many incredible things have happened I don't think I've quite digested it all. The one thing I do know is that this upcoming year will be full of new adventures!


Thank you to all the lovely readers of this blog and thanks to all the wonderful contributors for making this year at Naughty Author Chicks so much fun! I hope everyone has a great New Years and an even better 2011!

Thursday, December 30, 2010

A Year of Lents

by Cara McKenna

I wanted to share something that my evil conjoined romance-writing twin Meg Maguire is getting up to in the new year on her blog, so pardon me while I switch hats… Okay, here's Meg.


When I was a kid, I was always secretly jealous of my Catholic friends who, in my mental wording, "got to do" Lent each spring. It seemed so romantic to me, this notion of doing without for a month. So noble and selfless. My consciousness of Lent started in the late eighties as well, which meant I was also being bombarded with media mentions of "dieting". How grown up the women on TV were, always suffering for their diets! Suffering and going without seemed so sophisticated. Clearly Catholicism is genetic, as I was raised agnostic yet inherited all the guilt and self-loathing enjoyed by my foremothers.

Already, I'm going off topic. The point is, I've decided to do an entire year of Lent-like experiments. Every month in 2011, I'm going to either go without a vice or luxury, or else commit to doing a certain positive thing each day. No moral I'm trying to prove, here—there's no point to this exercise aside from challenging myself and giving myself a healthy shove toward the edge of my comfort zone. I've come to realize in past few years just how adaptable humans are, and I want to explore that a bit more, and hopefully surprise myself with my own flexibility and will.

Here's the schedule for what I'm calling my Discipline Year (you may take that in either the punitive or reverent sense, as I expect it'll be both):

1 GYMUARY For January, each and every day I will go to the gym—a twelve-minute walk from my house. Probably not the best month to pick this one since the weather in New England can be Russian roulette, but I've been slacking badly the last few weeks, so the sooner the better. And don't worry, I won't go nuts. I'll switch between cardio and yoga and group classes and swimming so I don't injure myself.

2 FACE-OFF FEBRUARY In February, I will forgo wearing make-up the entire month. There is a reason, aside from consonance, that I picked this shortest month to not wear make-up. I like the stuff and I've been wearing it since I was about fourteen or fifteen. But I'd like to see just how differently I'll feel about myself if I go without it for a few weeks.

3 MEAGER MARCH No frivolous purchases for the month of March. That means clothes, silly stuff from CVS, coffees or drinks while I'm out and about, iTunes or book downloads…spending on necessities and groceries only. (Alcohol counts as a grocery item, however, as the hideousness that is temperance is coming later in the year.) I'm not too worried about this one.

4 NO #&$%@! APRIL For April, I'm putting the cabash on my potty-mouth, from "damn" and "hell" on up the line of profanity. This will go for out loud swearing as well as tweets and blog posts, though my characters are still allowed to cuss their everloving heads off in my manuscripts, as always. I honestly have no clue how hard this will be, and since my swearing is more habitual than willful, I will have to come up with a penance system for when I inevitably slip up…a dollar to charity or something like that.

5 MEAT-FREE MAY I'll be going vegetarian for the month of May. For now this means no meat, including poultry and seafood. I'm open to tossing eggs and dairy into the mix and upgrading to vegan… I'd miss having cream in my coffee each morning, but if I'm feeling brave at the end of April, I'll up the ante.

6 NO JAVA JUNE That's right, no coffee. I'm dreading this one. I'm allowing caffeine, but substituting rooibus and green tea and maté will not make my grief any more bearable. Coffee is as much a comforting ritual to me as it is a chemical fix.

7 JUJUBE-FREE JULY That is to say, no candy. No extraneous sugar. If a food such as wine or fruit contains natural sugar, that's fine, but no candy, sweet drinks, pastries, or packaged food with sugar as one of its top five listed ingredients.

8 UP AND AT 'EM AUGUST For August I will set my alarm and rise promptly at five a.m. each morning. Normally I get up around six thirty, but I want to see exactly what I might get accomplished in those bonus ninety minutes before the rest of the world wakes up and demands my attention. Perhaps it will just be a lot of yawning, but perhaps it will be an entire extra novella.

9 SWITCH OFF SEPTEMBER In September, I will go without TV. Considering I don't own one, this should be easy, right? Hell no. Thanks to Hulu and Instant Watcher, I've got a mean TV habit going on, and I'll need to figure out other ways to enjoy my lunch hour or unwind at five aside from tuning in to my beloved crappo reality shows. Movies will be acceptable.

10 OMMM-CTOBER For October, I will commit to practicing yoga either at home or in a class for at least forty-five minutes each day. It's something I used to do before writing became my sacred daily practice, and I'm looking forward to reconnecting with it.

11 NOVEMBOOZE That's right, no alcohol for the month of November. I'm dreading this almost as much as the coffee month. And I did pick a holiday month on purpose, just to make it tougher. If I wind up with a contract or a release date in November, I'll just have to get creative with my celebrating. Perhaps a cupcake or a new necklace in place of the usual champagne.

12 DONATE DECEMBER Each day in December I will go through my clothes and other possessions and pick one nice thing to add to a Salvation Army-type donation box. December's usually stressful, and this is an easy one for me. Getting rid of older stuff feels good, and it makes room for new and exciting things to come into one's life. Seems like a good choice for the end of the year and the holiday season.

So that's the deal! The Super Lucky #1 Fun Blog will be like my 12-step meetings, so expect lots of whiny posts as I struggle through my various withdrawals and am tempted by seductive relapses. The first week of June should be especially entertaining as you watch me break up with my precious codependent lover, coffee. Oh how I will plead to get him back! And as early as next week you'll probably see posts about how very little I feel like sloshing through the icy slush to go to the gym. Stay tuned and watch me crumble. Or if you're similarly masochistic, join me for a month! If you do, let me know. I'd happily welcome any guest posters who wish to share their own self-denial experiments.

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Happy New Year with Story Videos




Happy New Year!!

We're at the end of the year and before we wind down the holiday season, I've been thinking about how we promote our books. I love pictures and words, so I've been doing what I want call "Story Videos."


What is a story video? you ask.

It's an idea I came up with when I decided to make audio stories with pictures and sound effects--including the four episodes for "A Naughty Christmas Carol."

You'd think it would be easy: write a short 5 to 7 minute story epsiode for my theme about a naughty christmas carol, then record the voiceover, take some pictures to reflect the characters and settings, go through my sound effects (I have a collection of more than a 1,000 sound effects!), add some royalty free music and poof!

Like magic you have a story video...

Oh, my, what fools we writers be.

Writing then rewriting the stories was the easy part.

Recording my voiceover...how many takes?

Sound effects? Have you tried to find the right grandfather clock chime to fit what's in your mind?

Compose pictures for the video: we're not talking one or two shots; I took hundreds of pix for my Naughty Christmas Carol videos before I narrowed them down to a few pictures.

Have you ever tried to cajole a Christmas Doll to have attitude in her picture?

At least she sat still for her photo session!

Have a wonderful 2011!

Monday, December 27, 2010

Mythology and Women--Kleitoris

A good friend recently recommended I browse through Barbara G. Walker's The Women's Encyclopedia of Myths and Secrets. So much of what we write is steeped in mythology, authors taking bits, pieces or entire swaths of myths and using them as a base for stories or characters. But some mythology became twisted or lost in time during the transition from female-oriented to male-oriented religions in western culture. Barbara's book is a fantastic, detailed resource of women's history and perspective in world culture. I thought I'd use my blog from time to time to share information I've stumbled upon in her encyclopedia.

Take, for instance, the word clitoris. It's a solid word we erotic romance authors use on a regular basis. Or at least its shorter form of clit, a sexier version. This does not happen in solely male/male novels, in which case the history lesson doesn't apply. But did you know the word clitoris is from the Greek kleitoris, meaning "divine, famous, goddess-like?" While Greek myths personified the phallus as Priapus, the female version was an Amazon queen named Kleite. Kleite was the ancestral mother of a tribe of women warriors who founded a city in Italy.

Alternately, in Corinth, Leite was a princess "whom Artemis made grow tall and strong," an allegory of her erection. A third interpretation saw her as a nymph who loved the phallus of the sun god and followed his motion with her "head." It's fascinating to find the origins of words. Tastes vary among readers as to the sexual words they enjoy in their stories and I have heard complaints that clitoris sounds too clinical. Perhaps seeing the word's background will lend it a more romantic air, herding our minds out of the medical textbooks and into the mists of mythology.

Still, when patriarchal culture took hold, woe came to the clitoris. The primary sex organ of females was ignored. The Christian church taught women should never take sexual pleasure, and only endure intercourse for procreation. So began a history of minimal body contact between pious married couples. In a witchcraft trial in 1593 the discovery of the clitoris by the investigating authority for the first time helped to convict the witch. History also records disgusting practices of clitoral cautery, sewing together vaginal lips and clitoridectomies to cure women of masturbation.

Thankfully, western culture has emerged out of its darkest hour (in part) and women's liberation has gone far to allow women to throw off the bedsheets and proudly rediscover the little hot button of their pleasure. Not to mention vibrators. The clitoris is proof of the goddess in us all. Feel free to mention this to your male partners next time their worship isn't up to par (smile).

Any favorite female oriented myths you've rediscovered or you would like me to check for in Barbara's book? Do tell.

Saturday, December 25, 2010


Please welcome our holiday guest blogger - Anh Leod/Heather Hiestand:

Without realizing it, I seem to find myself writing more and more about female power. Here are my last four heroines:

  1. Lexie, a retail buyer with a wealthy family (Christmas a Go-Go, new release)

  2. Lenchen, a British princess (Victoriana Adventure, upcoming release)

  3. Abbie, a college student/housewife with a trust fund and life insurance from her late husband’s death (The Bachelor, upcoming release)

  4. Nell, a mysterious long-lived warrior (work-in-progress)

And here are the equivalent heroes:

  1. Adrian, a shoe salesman/Ph.D. candidate

  2. Ollie, a college student/retail worker

  3. Jake, a grade school teacher

  4. Luke, a new protector

In two of these cases, the heroes are younger than the heroines. In one case, the hero is from a higher place in society, but due to the dynamics of the story, the heroine is more powerful.

Why am I writing about these unequal relationships? What makes them sexy to me? In the case of Christmas a Go-Go, the story is coming out of personal history. When Ellora’s Cave authors were offered a chance write something kinky, I remembered that shoe salesman who fondled my new white boots many years ago and a story was born. But instead of a confused high school student like I was, I made my heroine powerful. To say more would spoil the story.

My personal story echoes these patterns I’m finding in my work, since I married a younger man. When we met, I was mid-career and he was just starting out. This may simply be the kind of relationship I understand best. What I’ve learned is how thoroughly the tables can turn. Now I’m a housewife/mother and writer on the side and my husband is mid-career, while my high-tech career is long out of the picture and can’t really be picked up again. I also remember, because of the time period of my work-in-progress, Queen Victoria and how carefully she kept her new husband Albert out of the political picture until she started having babies. Gradually, the words from her mouth and pen became mostly his.

Maybe this is why we keep children out of erotic romance. They tend to turn the economic tables and therefore the power structure of relationships. What fun it is to be a woman in charge of life and pleasure. We might not need them, but men bring spice into the picture. Sometimes, we even find the man who adds so much to our existence that we keep him around permanently. That time of discovery can be the most exciting of our lives and how nice it is to start of a position of comfort so we don’t have to settle for something less than we want, sexually or otherwise.

Christmas a Go-Go is my newest Anh Leod release.

Blurb:

Lexie has a serious love for go-go boots and an heiress-sized fortune to build her collection. She has everything but a man who shares her fetish. When her new custom-made Christmas go-go boots capture the eye of Adrian, she wonders if she has finally found the one.

Adrian has always been turned on by a woman wearing boots, and he is immediately smitten with the lovely Lexie. Sparks fly and he leads her away to the VIP dressing room for a sultry, sexy tryst.

They both want more, and Lexie plans to have it. She wants Adrian at home, in front of her boot wall—naked, touching her body, touching her boots—while they have the best sex of their lives.

Buy link: http://www.jasminejade.com/ps-8800-50-christmas-a-go-go.aspx

Links:


www.anhleod.com

http://www.jasminejade.com/m-430-anh-leod.aspx

http://blog.heatherhiestand.com

Contest:

To celebrate the December 21st release of Christmas a Go-Go , as well as the releases of all the wonderful holiday guests at my blog, I'm throwing a contest! Comment here, or visit me and my guests at http://blog.heatherhiestand.com, or email me at anh @ anhleod.com (remove spaces before sending). There will be two prizes for the winner. A story from the Anh Leod backlist (tell us which one you want) and a story from a guest blogger's backlist (tell us which one you want). See further details at my blog.

Friday, December 24, 2010

New Release Just in Time for Christmas - SEXY SECRET SANTA!


I'm so excited! My hot new erotic Exotica romance SEXY SECRET SANTA comes out today with Ellora's Cave! I love writing holiday theme stories, especially Christmas ones, so when I came up with the idea for a story about a hero and heroine who get locked in their office building for the night, I thought why not have them end up there because they sneaked off during the office Christmas party for a little nookie?! The idea worked and my editor at EC loved it! Hope you do, too!

Happy Reading and Merry Christmas!




Hollie Kerr has lusted after hot architectural engineer Dirk Fraser ever since they started working together, so she’s thrilled to discover he’s her Secret Santa at the office Christmas party. What she doesn’t know is that her friend has led him to believe Hollie prefers a good spanking over a boring, old
present any day.

Though Hollie is surprised when Dirk put her over his knee, she can’t pass up the opportunity to get spanked by a hunky guy like him. Her upturned bottom isn’t the only thing that gets hot, however, and soon they’re having sex right there in the office. By the time they come up for air, the party has wrapped up, their coworkers have left and the building is locked up tight.

What’s a girl supposed to do when she’s trapped all night in the office with
a gorgeous guy? Have sex in all the places she’s ever fantasized about, of
course!



Excerpt:

Hollie frowned as a thought abruptly occurred to her. What if the whole I’ll-give-it-to-you-later thing was a stall tactic to hold her off until everyone left the party? Maybe Dirk had forgotten to get her anything at all. She hated to think he was type who would do something like that.

She finished off the last of her cookie, determined to figure out what Dirk was up to. “Okay, I can’t take it anymore,” she said to him. “I want my present now.”

His brow creased. “Seriously?”

“Uh-huh. I think I’ve been patient long enough. I want it now.”

Dirk hesitated, as if debating whether to give in to her demands, but then he finally nodded. “Okay, if you’re sure. But I think I better give it to you in private.”

Setting her half-empty cup of eggnog on the table, he took her hand and led her out of the atrium and down the hallway. His hand was big and strong and warm around hers, and she had to bite her lips to stifle a little moan at the tingle that ran through her at his touch.Hollie opened her mouth to ask where he was taking her when they stepped into the computer drafting and design studio. Since she didn’t work in the architecture side of the business, she didn’t come down to this part of the building often, but she knew Dirk spent a lot his time working in the room and she wondered if he had hidden her present in here. Then again, the studio was the farthest away from the atrium where the festivities were being held back out in the atrium and he had closed the door after they’d come in. Maybe Dirk wanted privacy when he gave her the present. That made her squirm in anticipation. What kind of gift could require this much privacy?

“So, where is it?” she asked.

He let out a soft, sexy chuckle. “Impatient, aren’t you?”

She grinned. “I prefer to think of myself as eager.

Taking her hand in his again, Dirk led her over to one of the drafting tables in the back of the room. But instead of reaching underneath it and coming up with the Christmas present
he had promised, he sat down in the chair and began to guide her over his knee.

Hollie looked at him in surprise. “What are you doing?”

He frowned up at her, confusion clear on his face. “Giving you your Christmas present, just
like you asked. Are you saying you changed your mind and don’t want it?”

Hollie knew exactly what kind of present she would end up with if she let Dirk drape her
over his lap like he obviously intended—a spanking! And while she loved a good spanking
as much as the next girl—okay, maybe a little more than the next girl—she was shocked
Dirk had thought to give her one. Was her kinky side that obvious? Was the fact that she
had a thing for strong, masculine men who knew how to warm her ass written all over her
face?

Well, however he knew, she wasn’t going to pass up an opportunity like this, not when a
guy as hot as Dirk was doing the spanking. Though she did understand now why he wanted to give her his present in private.

She gave him a sexy smile. “I didn’t change my mind. You can go ahead and give me my Christmas present.”

The corner of Dirk’s mouth edged up, but he didn’t say anything, just guided her the rest of the way over his knee. Familiar with being in that position, Hollie put her hands on the
floor to help balance herself. As he placed a strong hand on her back to keep her in place, she got the feeling he had done this sort of thing before, too.

Even though she liked getting spanked, Hollie couldn’t keep herself from tensing a little as
she waited for the first smack. But Dirk didn’t spank her right away. Instead, he gently
caressed her ass through her skirt. She had to stifle a sigh of pleasure. Regardless of the
fact that he seemed to know what he was doing, she had expected him to give her a dozen or so smacks on the derriere and be done with it. However, he was obviously going to take his time, which meant she was in for some serious fun.

When he finally brought his hand down on her upturned bottom, she gasped. The smack
seemed to echo in the room and she was grateful the rest of their coworkers were making
too much noise at the party to hear.

“Was that too hard?” he asked.

She looked over her shoulder at him. “No. You can spank me a little harder, if you want.”

His mouth quirked. “You really are a bad girl, aren’t you?”




Watch the Trailer!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hEu_rYXk8tw


Buy it from Ellora's Cave!
http://www.jasminejade.com/ps-8888-50-sexy-secret-santa.aspx


And for an excerpt from my other Holiday Themed Book, ALL SHE WANTS FOR CHRISTMAS and THE TROUBLE WITH NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS, visit my website at http://www.paigetylertheauthor.com/



*hugs*
Paige

"Stories so hot, they'll make your cheeks blush!"

http://www.paigetylertheauthor.com/
http://paigetylertheauthor.blogspot.com/

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Naughty Gingerbread Men

First off, I want to lay blame. My Facebook friends made me do this. I was typing along, minding my own business, when I posted that I was going to make gingerbread men. OK, so I may have said something about making them anatomically correct, but really guys, did you have to make me prove that I have a dirtier mind than you? You're not making it easy, but here it goes:


Gingerbread woman in pasties and G-string, Gingerbread woman in...well,nothing. She also either really needs a wax, or the icing nozzle wasn't behaving.


This was my first attempt at a hot male gingerbread bod. Yeah, it gets better. Actually, I didn't get better. I got help.

Did you know that that when you try to make an anatomically correct gingerbread man, you can't put it on top of the cookie? Apparently, it has the same effect as a real man in icy cold water. Learn something new every day. Lesley, this one is for you. I tried, honest. In fact, I felt so bad for the poor guy that I made him one of his own:


This was about the time that one of my teenage boys came into the kitchen. I thought he was going to vomit, but apparently Marge created obscene baked items in an episode of The Simpsons, so he thought it was cool.

And here is where I got help. Cynthia, what a great idea! Here he is from his profile, tho not the cover (too hard). This next one is for you and Angelo!

A Naughty Christmas Carol: Episode 4



















Click here if you missed Episode 1 of “A Naughty Christmas Carol.”


Click here if you missed Episode 2 of "A Naughty Christmas Carol"

Click here if you missed Episode 3 of “A Naughty Christmas Carol.”


EPISODE 4:


Poor Sir Harry. This once dashing gentleman had turned into a disagreeable sod who cared for no one but himself. Not Lady Florentine, nor his mistress Nellie Rose or the girls at Madame Moiret’s bawdy establishment All this had become clear to him after he was visited by the ghosts of Christmas Past and Christmas Present.

Sir Harry seems to be a changed man…but will those changes last?

He feared what could come next. What’s in store for Sir Harry in the future?

Watch the final episode of “A Naughty Christmas Carol” and find out what shocking event the Ghost of Christmas Future reveals to Sir Harry.

Monday, December 20, 2010

Holiday Moments

With Hanukkah behind us and Christmas just a few days away, I was thinking about what makes up "the holidays." Lots of memories go into filling up that yearly event. Basically, all those warm, fuzzy feelings are individual memories strung together like popcorn garlands.

A couple weeks ago we joined a group of friends for a Hanukkah party we've been repeating for many years now. I watched all the kids (who are all teenagers now) light the menorah and say the blessing. Warm, fuzzy moment.

I exchanged gifts with a business associate I've known for two decades. We know each other so well that our gifts have become personal - a favorite perfume or a new addition to a collection. Warm, fuzzy moment.

I just finished baking Christmas cookies with my daughter. We sat across the table from each other and painted icing and drizzled sprinkles and laughed and talked. About nothing and everything. Warm fuzzy moment. (Until she started feeling nauseated from all the frosting and cookie pieces she'd consumed!)

In a few days we'll drive around our neighborhood and look at all the Christmas lights and listen to holiday music on the radio. Warm, fuzzy moment.

For us it's not about which holidays we celebrate or don't celebrate. It's about making those moments the best they can be. A week after Christmas, my husband and I will toast the new year, as we've done for the last twenty-four years. Twenty-four warm, fuzzy moments.

I hope you enjoy every single moment of your holiday celebration, whatever that entails. And if something doesn't go exactly as planned, take away the best part of it and tuck it away like your holiday decorations, but leave the box where you can get to it any time you want.

Have a Merry Christmas and very happy New Year.

Friday, December 17, 2010

The Year Winding Down

As the year is winding down I decided to look over my ‘goals’ list I make every January to see if I’d stuck to my plan this year. I was pleasantly surprised to realize that for the most part I had. A couple things were tweaked because the first book in a series I was working on didn’t sell, but I wrote another one so it equaled the number of single titles I wanted to finish this year. As far as word count goes, I’m happy with my total. This year has been exciting for a number of reasons. I made quite a few sales to Ellora’s Cave and after being placed with a new editor (*sniffle* mine left) I really like her. Switching editors can be terrifying but this has been a good move so far. Under my alter ego I sold two books to Carina and I accomplished my dream of selling to New York (which still feels surreal). Of course my first release from NAL/Signet won’t be until 2012 so it’s almost anticlimactic (but not really, lol).



In my personal life I made some big changes as well. We moved to a new state and I took the plunge into writing full time. I thought I’d end up writing more than I did before but oddly enough, I write pretty much the same amount. The only difference is I have nights and weekends free to spend with my family which is incredibly nice. After the move I joined a new RWA chapter and have found a wonderful group of ladies to call friends. Not to mention I learned to cook a lot more creative meals which has made the hubby very happy.



I’m already friends with one of my critique partners (the fabulous Wynter Daniels) but I also got to meet my other CP (Kaylea Cross) in person this year when her husband planned a trip to New Orleans, which is close to my home. In addition to that I met the very funny Naima Simone at a luncheon! So while I dealt with inevitable rejections (some worse than others) and a few biting reviews, the year was pretty great personally and professionally. Meeting women I’ve come to respect and admire in person has been a big highlight this year and one I hope to repeat next year.


Currently I’m still working on my ‘goals’ list for next year. What goals did you accomplish this year? And I know it’s early, but what goals do you think you’ll make for next year?


In advance, I hope everyone has a Merry Christmas or Happy Hanukkah (or whatever you might celebrate)!!

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Don't Think, Just Answer!

by Cara McKenna

It's holiday time, and we're all brain-dead. So, a totally pointless but fun post from me this week. Copy these questions, paste them in a comment, and answer (any or all) without thinking too hard. Lemme in yo' noggins!

Favorite recent book:

All-time favorite book:

Book that most changed your life:

All-time favorite author:

Favorite band or musical artist:

Favorite album (by any artist):

Best song ever:

Your favorite song right now:

Favorite recent movie:

All-time favorite movie:

Favorite actor:

Favorite actress:

Favorite recent (last five years) TV show:

All-time favorite TV show:

Favorite game (video-, board-, parlor-, drinking-, anything):

Foxiest person alive:

Coolest person alive:

Funniest comedian, living or dead:

Job you'd love to try for one day:

Dream car (or other mode of transportation):

If you had to get a tattoo today:


That's it! Check you in the comments. Can't wait to see what folks are into…

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

A Naughty Christmas Carol: Episode 3




















Click on the links below if you missed the previous episodes:


A Naughty Christmas Carol: Episode 1


A Naughty Christmas Carol: Episode 2


EPISODE 3:


Sir Harry can’t believe his eyes when a beautiful ghost comes to visit him at midnight, just like Lord Buckley said she would. The Ghost of Christmas Past.

Why has this ghost come to visit Sir Harry? To make him change his ways?

That won’t be an easy task, even for a ghost.

When the Ghost of Christmas Present shows up, Sir Harry sees his lady love, Lady Florentine, and his mistress, Nellie Rose, as he’s never seen them before.

Find out what happens to Sir Harry when he’s visited by these two ghosts on a cold, snowy Christmas Eve…




Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Betcha Didn't Know That!

Sooo...yeah...I racked my brain all day and I couldn't come up with anything to blog about. I thought and thought...thunk and thunk...aaaannddd nothin'.

Except...

...Did you know that Christmas trees are edible? A great source of Vitamin C. Take that orange juice!

..."Hot cockles" was a Christmas game played during medieval times...that's just a little too easy, isn't it? I'm not going to say it, I'm really not. But if one of you NACs come out with a book called "Hot Cockles" I want credit!!

...There are more nose jobs performed in the month of December than any other month of the year. Its the gift that keeps on giving!




...Charles Dickens' first choice for Scrooge's Bah Humbug was actually Bah Christmas. Good choice, Charles. Bah Christmas just doesn't have the same je ne sais quoi...


...The first president to decorate the White House Christmas tree was Franklin Pierce...who?


...If you received all of the gifts in "The Twelve Days of Christmas" you would have 364 gifts...That's a helluva lotta milk!


...1 in 3 men wait until Christmas Eve to finish their shopping. Wow. Shocker.

..."Tiny Tim" in A Christmas Carol was almost Small Sam, Puny Pete and Little Larry...*snicker* Again, just too easy...but I knew a puny Pete...I also knew a diminutive Dave...a minuscule Mike...

...And this isn't a fact but I just had to add that I have never liked the song, "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus". I mean, this poor kid just caught his mother getting her freak on with 'ol Kris Kringle!! Traumatizing!

...Did you know that my short story, Claiming Christmas, was released on December 10th and that the booktrailer is below?



Sorry, folks. Next time I'm going to come up with a great topic to blog about. I promise! 'Til then, Merry Christmas!!

Monday, December 13, 2010

Slutting Up the Holidays!

Holiday traditions will never be the same. I'm here today to sing the praises of a very adult alternative to the well-respected, well-loved Christmas tradition of the Nutcracker. While families everywhere will continue to enjoy taking their little ones to this ballet, there's a show out there you will need to leave the little dearies home to attend. The Slutcracker.

Some friends and I decided to get into the spirit of the season last night and traipse out to this fantastic burlesque show where bawdy humor meets vaudeville in a hilarious parody of the familiar ballet. I'd only recently attended my first burlesque show on a girls' weekend trip to Chicago and loved it. Many laughs.

The show's creator, Vanessa White, returned a third year running with this production. In it a young Clara has grown up and is engaged to be married. Her aunt is concerned about her niece's lack of sexual experience, so surprises Clara with the gift of an enchanted dildo. And the festivities begin from there.

Hilarious! And one stellar moment when a pastie flew off a featured dancer. She covered up her breast with one hand, but in the final moments let it all hang out to end the dance with her big moves. We've all seen worse at the movies.

Although the holiday season is rife with lovely traditions, excitement and festive gatherings, it comes with a lot of stress for many. It can be a time of mourning for those who have lost a loved one during this time of year, or whose absence we feel at a moment reserved for sharing with family. So I value any new tradition that lets us relax, kick back, and enjoy with no reservations. My guess is few of the audience associated the Slutcracker with past traditions. It is about creating a new, adult tradition. Why should the kids have all the fun at Christmas?

So if you're lucky enough to be in the New England area this month and can get tickets, I'll give the production a two thumbs up. (I think there's also a few shows in Montreal at the end of December.)

I want to wish all of you out there an advance Merry Christmas. I do not actually celebrate the holiday. My own winter festivities have already wrapped up for December. The latkes and dreidels were lovely, but if I'd known Christmas could be as much fun as the Slutcracker, I might have signed on for the holiday earlier.

Peace and Love,
Michelle

http://www.theslutcracker.com/home.html

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Nobody's Perfect


Today we have a guest blocker at the clubhouse. Kris Starr is joining us and she's even offered to give a copy of her book, Higher Learning to one commenter! So here she is~~~


Hey there, everyone! Thanks to the Naughty Author Chicks for having me today. It’s great to be here!

I want to talk about something important that many writers deal with (yours truly included) that can hamper your writing and stall you on the road to success.

My newest release, Higher Learning (Ellora’s Cave), took me a very, very long time to write. I actually started it many years ago. I liked the idea a lot, and thought the plot was quite sound. The problem was, things just weren’t fitting properly. The words weren’t conveying the meaning I truly wanted. I felt it just wasn’t good enough. So I kept putting the manuscript aside, thinking that tomorrow would be better and that I’d figure out how to perfect it somehow.

And that was the problem. That specific tomorrow just wasn’t coming. And the longer it took, the more disheartened I became.

It was my husband who helped me out of that slump, though. One day, after I’d been particularly mopey and disappointed, he said to me, “Don’t let perfection be the enemy of good.”

It struck a chord.

So I pulled out the story again and began to plug away at it. And even though it was hard as hell to keep going, I didn’t stop. The moral of the story? The book ended up finished, polished, incredibly satisfying, and most importantly – sold.

In other words, don’t expect what you put down on screen to be perfect – at least, not every single word of it. (Of course you’ll have turns of phrase or bits of dialogue you’re particularly proud of, but that tends to be more the exception rather than the rule.) You need to give yourself permission to write average (or even poor) stuff. Getting closer to perfection can come with polishing and edits, but you need to finish that draft, first. Nobody’s a genius right out of the gate. Don’t let that stop you from writing something that can eventually grow and evolve into a fantastic masterpiece.

Am I completely able to do this myself, now that I’ve learned the lesson?

Uh, well, not quite yet. I still stumble on a regular basis. (I am only human, after all!) It’s just a matter of reminding myself of my husband’s words when my brain’s not working and the sentences just seem utterly ridiculous.

Don’t worry. Keep going. You can do it. After all, nobody’s perfect.

Keep on truckin’,

Kris

Kris lives in the wilds of Northern Canada with her two daughters and science geek husband. She spends her time attempting to control household chaos, indulging her crafty side with various knitting, sewing and miscellaneous handmade projects, and creating stories for Carina Press and Ellora’s Cave. Kris has been writing since the age of ten, beginning with a Nancy Drew-style mystery story featuring herself and a couple of her friends. Future leanings became clear, however, when she started penning naughty stories for high-school friends, featuring Scott Baio, Rick Springfield or any member of Duran Duran.

She welcomes reader comments at starrstruck@gmail.com, and can be found on the Internet at www.krisstarr.com and on Twitter @Kris_Starr.

One lucky commenter will win a copy of Kris’ latest release, Higher Learning, from Ellora’s Cave!

Blurb:

Work on Anne’s Master’s Thesis is going well…until her world is spun off its axis by the stunningly beautiful and very sexy Leslie. Interviewing this woman about her sexual history is turning into an exquisite form of sensual torture but somehow Anne can’t find it in herself to stay away. On top of that, Leslie’s scorching kisses and electrifying caresses bring long-buried feelings and painful memories to the surface. And it doesn’t help that Anne’s boyfriend, Michael, is willing to let Anne do a little experimentation…

Anne’s obsession with Leslie begins to spiral out of control, affecting both her work and her relationship with Michael, until all that remains is the possibility of an affair. One that Anne both craves and fears. But not everything is as it seems, and it turns out Anne’s not the only one keeping secrets…

***And the winner is... Portia! Congrats. Kris will contact you. ***